Welcome to the Wonderful World of Jourdain...

"Behind every successful person is a pack of haters."- Samantha Snow Strother

If having to call my self a hero, I would say that I am the Transcendent Hero. With a troubling past, nightmare memories and still a rockypresent, I look to the future knowing that I will make it through. All of my mistakes and past failures have brought me and will bring me success because I have learned from them. Jourdain Alesia Nicot is my birth name, and I for one think my name is p-e-r-f-e-c-t! October fourteenth is a national holiday on my calender. The first thing that people should know about me is that I am one-hundred percent random. I am extremely out spoken and asking questions and speaking my mind is not something that I fret about. Sadly, I am never able to make a straight-forward decision. Ironically, I'm not one to judge. Quite often my honesty is mistaken for judging. I desire and dream of becoming a photographer when I'm out of college. I'm very sarcastic but I'm not mean-hearted. I can be incredibly nice or dangerously mean, it just depends on who you are. I strongly believe that all types of drama belongs on a theater stage. I can't tell a joke to save my life but I've been told that I'm some-what humorous. Also I am very analytical, which means I am a enormous thinker. It is incredibly annoying and causes most of my problems. I'm very versatile, I don't belong in a group and labels aren't my thing. I have some incredible friends and a great boyfriend that help me through those days were I want to give up. I love volleyball and photography. My camera, volleyball, iPod and a little money is all I need to survive right now. I'm very outgoing and I love to explore and I dream of traveling. As hard as it is for some people to believe, I am not a narcissist and I'm not a conceited person. Actually I'm very insecure at times and I have suffered from low self esteem issues since the third grade. Although I often hide my self esteem with cockiness. My friends say I'm insane but I call it independent.

That Girl is Going, Going, Gone.

"Photography expresses the words that we cannot speak."- Unknown.

Ever since I can remember, for years I have wondered why am I here? Where am I going? What is the purpose for my existence? Was I created for the simple pleasure of ones enjoyment, or am I here to change the world, to become someone who starts a revolution?

I am going to be a photographer when I finish college. I want to use the skills and talents that I have been blessed with and put them to use. I want to take pictures that will amaze people and bring new meaning to the world of photographic art. I want to intern at a magazine company or a newspaper, to gain experience, but when I become professional, I want to photograph people, a celebrity photographer. I love photography. A beautiful photograph has the ability and power to make people feel emotions that they probably thought  they could never feel.

I believe that I was created, to become some one, to do something extraordinary with my life. I believe that I am on this quest to discover all the wonderful things in life, and on the way, to find myself. My whole life, up to now, I have had people telling me everyday, every minute, that I cannot do something. That I will never amount to anything. I have been told that I am a nobody, to give up, and give in to failure. With all this negativity, you would think that I would give in, but I am not one to let other people decide my future. I love that people doubt me, because the day that I prove them wrong, their expression will be like a Monet extraordinaire.

I am on a quest, a journey, a path in which I make all the choices, I decide what is right and what is wrong. I refuse to live a life that is unsatisfying, depressing, and endless cloudy day. I have seen people with all the talent and potential in the world, throw it all away. I hope that my personal odyssey will encourage and inspire others to go the distance, and be somebody in this world of possibilities I am going to be everything and more, because I have the drive, the mental strength to do things that people only dream of. Nothing as big as Cyclops or as small as an ant is going to stop me and my desires from coming true.

Sculpting a Future

"You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you're going to live. Now." -Joan Baez

In almost every action movie that we see, the hero always has a mentor. In "Hercules", he had Phil, in "Rocky", he had Mickey, "The Karate Kid" there was Mr. Miyagi. These mentor's train and teach these unforgettable heroes valuable important life lessons. The mentors are often the back bone of the hero. Although I am only fifteen, I have met some pretty unforgettable people so far on my journey. Mr. Wiley Vonner, also known as Coach Vonner. He was my English teacher in both seventh and eighth grade. Those two years with him were two years that I will never forget. He instilled so many life lessons in me that I will forever carry with me on my journey. He was the first person who told me, "life his hard, but you must be harder." He taught me that working hard does pay off. I don't even think of his class as an English class, it was more like English/Life 101. I could talk to him about anything! He inspired me and challenged me to take my writing to new heights. My love for writing soared after being in his class for two years.

The next person that inspired me, and brought out a talent I never knew I had, was my seventh and eighth grade volleyball coach, Coach Ashley. Starting middle school was big step for me, and I wanted to try everything! I had already signed up for athletics but I wasn't sure what sport I wanted to play yet. On the first day their was announcements about volleyball tryouts the next two days after school. I was skeptical about the idea because I had never played before but I figured I had nothing to lose. Surprisingly I was actually good, I made the B team! That year I learned so many things and I began to love the game! Coach Ashley encouraged me to play the next year and I did. This time I made the A team! That year my skills really improved and Coach Ashley saw this. She encouraged me to play in a select league that started after season was over so I could further advance my skills. I joined Mesquite Elite late October, and made the team. Then in the summer right before my Freshman year at Horn, the Horn High school Varsity Volleyball coach, Coach Reed contacted Coach Ashley and asked her if she had any exceptionally good players who would like to play with the Junior Varsity (JV) team in a Summer League. Out of the three teams at Terry, Coach Ashley picked me! She told me that I had the potential to be great and with my deep love for the game, I could go far. That Summer along with friend Morgan Finley, picked from Berry, we played with the Horn JV team! Coach Ashley believed in me and taught me the basics I needed to be a good player! That summer in August, I tried out for the Horn volleyball team and I was the only freshman beside my friend Morgan to make the JV team! Making the team was the highlight of my Freshman year and I owe it all to Coach Ashley! She taught me the importance of practicing and persevering.
The next mentor that I have is my number one fan for life, my mother. She has been the only person I can rely on. For fifteen years she has been the only one in my corner. She has taken care of me and taught me things that only a mother can teach me and more. My dad when I was younger was not in my life and although now he somewhat is, all my life she had to be my mommy and daddy. Providing me with enough love to overwhelm Cupid, she made my childhood one of the best. Never showing any negativity, never letting me see her cry, through those years that were tough, she always kept her head up. When we had nothing, she always was optimistic and showed me the brighter things in life when we were in the dark. My mother has always told me the truth, never has she hidden something from me nor has she let me walk around believing something that was not true. When she can, she gives me pretty much whatever I want, but she doesn't spoil me to the point where I am a brat. She disciplined me and taught me right from wrong. She taught me to say, "Yes Ma'am" and "No Sir". She let me make mistakes and taught me to learn from them. If I made anything lower than an 85 in any other subject or less than a 90 in English on a report card, she would ground me and usually some form of of physical punishment was included. Although I haven't had to deal with that problem since the fifth grade. She taught me the value of hard work and taught me that not everyone is your friend. I learned not to trust everyone and not every boy I come across is going to be nice. She taught me how to stick up for myself, respect others, and taught me how to be all I can be.
We fuss, argue, and at times I cannot stand her but at the end of the day no matter what happens I know that she loves me dearly. I know she will always be there for me. I know if the world decided to shun me one day, she would be the one person who will hold my hand. She is my mother as well as my friend, and I love her more than anything.

Shoulder Bust

"Pain makes man think. Thought makes man wise. Wisdom makes life endurable." -John Patrick

During volleyball season in seventh grade, I had a horrible accident. At home I was storing some of my old stuff in the attic. After I was done storing all my boxes I climbed down. Standing on an old stool, I tried to fold the ladder up that was connected to the attic. All of a sudden, one of the broken legs on the stool snapped and the whole right side of the stool slipped from underneath me, crumbled it laid on the carpet. I now, very scared and worried tried to balance on the left side of the stool with only two legs and a small platform holding me up. The ladder now feeling more heavy began to slip from my fingers as one of the left legs snapped. I knew that I had to jump before I broke both of my own legs and maybe even an arm. Right as the last leg snapped, I jumped into the air. Evidently I forgot about the ladder and while in the air, it hit me on the back right on my right shoulder,  and popped it out of place. Feeling excruciating pain, I fell to the ground and rolled into a door. As sonn as I smacked into the door, my shoulder popped back into place. I laid their, clutching my shoulder tears flowing from my eyes. After about thirty minutes, I got up and cleaned the mess. Thinking that nothing was wrong with me, I continued about my day, not telling anyone.

At practice I was working on my serve I felt my shoulder pop out of place but then immediately pop back in. A sharp pain jolted throughout my body. I dropped the ball, and clenched my shoulder for a moment. After stretching for a moment I continued serving with my shoulder no longer bothering me. For the next year this continued to happen, my shoulder randomly, usually twice every month.

While working on my hitting one day,I felt a tear in my shoulder, and I stopped, decided to ice my shoulder. The next day I was playing back row and dived after a ball. When I hit the ground, my shoulder laid in front of me. As I looked my shoulder, I noticed something was wrong, the ball of my shoulder was out of place. As i stood up I realized that my shoulder popped out of place but didn't pop back in. A horrible pain ran throughout my body and I began to cry as my coach ran over to me. As she held my arm she told me think of something random. I began to think about what my dad, living in Colorado was doing. While my mind was occupied she popped my shoulder back into place. For the rest of practice, I sat out icing my shoulder. My mom took me to the doctor and  there he told me that my shoulder bone was chipped, and the ligaments were torn and broken. He said I would need surgery as soon as possible.

My surgery was on Friday February 13, 2009. The pain was unbearable and the pain killers left me drained and tired. For a month I was consumed into a sling and then endured a harsh physical therapy for almost three months. Just two weeks ago from today, I was released to play volleyball again, no hitting though until late June or early July. I hadn't worked out in nearly six months but during those six months, as I worked on getting my physical strength back in my right arm I also gained mental strength. I knew that when I started working out, it would not be easy but if I could mentally prepare myself, then I would make up for most of the physical I would be lacking. That first week that I worked out, I did great! I pushed myself and didn't give up. At the end of the week Coach Reed talked to me about my work ethic and told me she was happy that I came back strong and I worked harder than majority of the girls who had been working out longer than me.

I am still working on strengthening my right arm, and I see improvement everyday. This situation, is my threshold guardian. Going through all that pain taught me and helped me gain mental strength. I am now strong inside and out, because I fought my weakness and persevered.

Lurking in the Shadows

"To light a candle is to cast a shadow." -Ursula Le Guin


A shadow is a figure that never leaves you. It watches your every move and in fact mirrors it. My shadow, is myself. Everyday I must conquer small battles verses myself. There are two sides to me, almost like I suffer from split personality disorder. One side of me is the Jourdain that my friends, family, teachers and the public sees. She is a normal teenage girl. She plays volleyball, she goes to the mall and watches movies on a rainy day. The other side of Jourdain, I call her Jasmine. She is devious and dark. She comes out when Jourdain is alone and sometimes in front of other people. She tells Jourdain negative thoughts and fills her head with dangerous and crude ideas and dreams. Jasmine is the complete opposite of Jourdain. Jourdain is an optimistic person, she is someone who doesn't like to dwell on the bad things in life, but Jasmine does. Jasmine believes life is one big chance to mess up and spend an eternity stuck in one big depressed life. Jourdain wants to travel, see the world, and explore. However Jasmine tells her all the time that it will never happen. Jasmine tells her lies of how she is weak and never will leave Mesquite Texas.

I am Jourdain, however Jasmine is a part of me too. Jasmine is that doubt that I feel when faced with a problem. Jasmine is the ant that bites me when I sit in the grass. Her bite stings and leaves a mark on me until eventually it fades away but me knowing that it is likely for it to come back. It is physically impossible to leave your shadow. Jasmine is with me for life, but she will not determine how my life will play out. Although she may have a little bit of power over me now, I know further along my journey I will gain the power to silence her forever.

Dre'Anna Banana!

"A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway."
-Jerome Cummings


It was a warm sunny day in Mesquite. Not a cloud was in the sky and a slight breeze swept across the playground at J.R. Thompson Elementary school. Me, a third grader then was running around on the play ground when I saw a girl who looked like my old best friend from my old school, Stephanie. I frantically began waving my arms and running towards the girl, shrieking, "Stephine! Stephine! Stephine!" When I finally got to the the girl, she gave me a weird look and told me her name was Dre'Anna, not Stephine. After questioning her, I apologized and ran back to the swings. That day was the day I met my best friend, Dre'Anna Biffle.
Dre'Anna Biffle is my trickster in my life. She and I have been friends since the third grade and through all those years, to this day I still consider her one of the few people I love and trust. Dre' and I have endured insane and ludicrous moment during our friendship.

Dancing, shouting, yelling random things in the middle of no where with inside jokes flying out of our mouths, this girl make life fun for me. She is like the other half of me. Both of us, raging attitudes, rebel minded and misunderstood. She gets me when nobody else does and I believe it is the same with her. We fight and we argue and we give each other space. We have made our share of mistakes, such as trusting people we knew not to.

Such as in middle school, there was a boy named Cesar Estrada. Cesar very much liked Dre' and became our "friend." For two years he manipulated us against each other and caused drama. For instance, I would tell him something, then he would twist my words and tell Dre' and vice-versa. Finally after one huge fight Dre' and I sat down and talked, without Cesar. We came to a conclusion that all of our fights were the source of Cesar. After dropping him as a friend, Dre' and I became closer.

Dre' is somebody I can talk to without asking for honesty, she automatically just tells me the truth. She is like me, not afraid to be different, not afraid to say yes, not afaid to be somebody. She makes me smile and I'm always laughing when I'm with her. Every hero needs that trickster, that person that takes away from all the stress, and helps the heros just be happy for a moment. I'm glad I have her.

Ones That Make the Firsts and the Lasts

"Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down." -Unknown

Every hero needs a band of companions The ones that they go to when they are sick of the world. My band of companions consist of some unlikely and unusual characters. Along with Dre'Anna, comes my friend Callie McGovern.

Callie and I have been friends for almost eleven years. She was pretty much first best friend. She and I both alike but very different. We have been through hard times and when I look back, she has always had my back or been there for me. Callie is more like my sister. We argue, bicker, fight and ignore each other but we practically grew up together. She knows pretty much a lot about me, and I her. She was there all those years my dad wasn't and showed me love and compassion. For years when we were younger, I would spend every weekend with her, always. Now that we are older, dealing with the hard times the economy has brought, we see each other whenever we can. I pray for her every night and love to hear her voice. No matter happens in my life, I will always love and cherish her.

Jeffery Ross Jones,  is my amazing "Sexy beast"! This kid is one of the most amazing people I have ever met. Introduced through Callie about four years ago, we have maintained a good friendship. Ross, I call him my Jones because one of my favorite memories with him is when we went to the harbor and bought some Jones Soda. I remember thinking, Wow! I'm drinking Jones with my Jones! Ross is such a funny, intelligent, and all around great person. Although we don't hang out as much as we wish we could, we keep in touch and I know whenever there is a new episode of "Grey's Anatomy" on, he is watching just as intently as I am. The last time I hung out with Ross we were at our friend's band, rehearsal. That was one of the best days of my life. I miss him so much and we have made plans to hang out sometime this summer!

Eric Shelton,  is one of the funniest people in the world! Eric, knowing him since the fourth grade he has been there for me through all the drama middle school and now with freshman year at an end, he and I are still close. Eric is someone you can trust with your secrets. He is real and is honest. Eric is one of the coolest and most laid back insane person I have ever met. He gives me a hug every day and smiles, which usually puts me in a good mood. I hope Eric and I stay friends for a long time because I believe everyone needs an Eric Shelton in their life.

Briana Medina is definition of weird and unusual! Although she and I have been friends for almost a year, I trust her. She makes me smile and is just like me! Crazy, insane, bubbly, and just a regular cool too for school nerd! I have told Bri secrets that I haven't told people that I have known for years. She is easy to talk to and she has opened up to me and trusts me with her beloved secrets. Bri will be a Freshman next year and I am excited for her to experience all of the things I did, and hopefully more! I look forward every day talking to her and giggling at her interesting stories everyday. She is one of the lamest people that I know and I like her just like that!

Last but defiantly not least is my boyfriend of almost three months, Marcel Williams. I have never been a boy crazy girl and having a boyfriend was my priority while I was in middle school. Finally I gave up looking for the perfect boyfriend, and just decided the right one would come to me whenever I was ready. During Spring Break I received a text from a boy I had met a few months earlier, asking me if I wanted to go to the movies with him. Bored out of mind and ready to take new chances, I accepted and brought along my friend Che'. The next three days after that we hung out and text each other. I began to grow fond of him, then I began to like him. On March 21, 2009 he asked me to be his girlfriend. Marcel is someone that I can talk to, joke around with and just be myself with him. He listens to me and treats me with respect. He loves spider man, and Michigan State and most of all football. He calls me a lame and a nerd but he is just as much as a nerd as me! We roll around in the grass, take silly pictures, slow dance in the middle of the street to oldies, wrestle each other, and have competitions to see who can call each other the most rude names. He really makes me happy and I love being with him. I pray that however long we are together, he continues to make me smile, bringing me true happiness to my life.